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Happy Friday and here's to the 3 R's: Reading, Riding and Rules.
After 4 years of not belonging to a gym, I finally decided to join again. After 20 years of belonging to a gym, I called it quits, mostly because of the ‘gay vanity’ crap that our gay culture is so consumed by: youth, body, and looks. I couldn’t take this idea of having to fit into a mold of perfection. I had to break the rules in some way.
I decided to rejoin because, aside from walking and little workouts at home, I needed a change of pace. I’m mostly looking forward to reading books while riding a stationary bicycle; it felt good this morning. For 45 minutes I cycled and caught up on reading Alexander McQueen’s biography. It’s been cool to read his biography and later Youtube the fashion shows being referenced.
Alexander once said, “You’ve got to know the rules in order to break them.” I loved this! Not so much because I like breaking rules, because I actually do follow the rules, but rather because I like making my own set of rules. It makes life more interesting and I live according to who I am, me. My little sister Blanca once referenced it as being 'Ricky's world.'
The piece featured here is from my artist inspired “Little Girls” series. It contains two seperate canvases; it’s titled “Light My Fire.” It’s inspired by David LaChapelle’s photograph of both McQueen and Isabella Blow. It was she that really took him under her wings and introduced him into the fashion world.
Thank you Ms. Blow and thank you Alexander for breaking the rules so beautifully.
Have a great weekend and cheers to breaking rules even if they’re your own, especailly if they're your own.
Ah, it’s a beautiful Saturday in LA. I’m now on day 6 of 21 days of cleansing/detox. Will I make it? I think I will. A week before my Vegas trip last week, I started reading Clean by Alejandro Junger. It’s been 30 years since I fell in love with reading books. And of the hundreds of books I’ve read; only about 25 of them have left a lifelong lasting impression. Alejandro’s book is now one of them. It’s changed my perspective on eating and the habits revolved around it. It’s not that I won’t now be eating burgers and stuff, but I’ll think twice about what I put into my body.
While doing this clean program, I’ve thought about Gandhi. He not only fasted as a way of protest, but he was a vegan, before being vegan became almost fashionable. Though I didn’t enjoy his biography much, it did leave me wondering about man’s ability to fast and above all our willpower to survive. The piece featured here is in Gandhi’s honor. He changed our world and inspired great leaders in Nelson Mandela and Martin Luther King.
The first couple of days were a bit tough especially with not having my morning coffee and walking while drinking it. The ritual was the toughest. This morning I went for a 2 hour walk and it wasn’t too bad. I ended up finding tons of stickers on the street from our local LA artist. I’ve already added them to my scrapbook. I, of course, left a few of my own out on the streets of my beloved city. This newfound project has brought so much joy in my life. It reminded me that I used to collect junky stickers when I was a kid. And the best part is that I found a large sticker that read, "Eat Good, Poop Good." It was little sign from God to keep going with this clean program.
Indian guru Sri Sathya Sai Baba said, “Krishna insisted on outer cleanliness and inner cleansing. Clean clothes and clean minds are an ideal combination.” I’d have to add a clean body as well, inside and out. But if all this is to be true, I must now do some laundry and a little house cleaning.
… and maybe a nap and warm bath.
Keep Clean, Carry on.
Happy Saurday.
It’s been a little while since I last posted. I just got back from 5 days in Vegas for the Travel Show; I’ve been consumed with work.
For the past month during my morning walks, I’ve been placing stickers from my LITTLE Pop series out into the public streets of LA. In doing so, I’ve come to recognize quite a few artists and have become a little obsessed in collecting these street art stickers. Carefully, I peel them off and have started a scrapbook collection.
With my own stickers, I place them mostly on street signs; afterwards, I photograph them. I find a sense of humor in it. This morning, I took the photo featured here; it’s titled “Queen and Her Dog.” I can only imagine Queen Elizabeth picking up after her dog.
Aside from taking photos of these stickers/signs, I haven’t done any new work. For now, it’s OK, I’m having a good time doing this. Quite a few of the stickers I've come across have sayings on them. My personal favorite simply says "Bankrupt Slut." The idea of a slut being bankrupt makes me laugh each time I come across it.
Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, "It is said that the world is in a state of bankruptcy, that the world owes the world more than the world can pay." Though this was written many years ago, it applies more so now than ever before. If only each one of us could pay it forward a little more often than not. Give back.
Have a beautiful week.
It was only last week that news broke out that the Pope was resigning. Honestly, I was kind of happy. Any upheaval within the church reminds me of why I left it. There were too many questions and no answers in return. I was 17 years old when I told Papa that I was no longer going to church. His look told me that he wanted to hit me, but he didn’t; he just walked away. It was a turning point in a young mans life now non-Catholic life.
Who knew that 28 years later I’d be staging a short-lived campaign for a transgender woman for Pope! Amanda Lepore for Pope! The Pope’s resignation inspired me to create this mini campaign when going to Evita, in Hollywood, last Tuesday night.
And because of this little idea, I had the pleasure of hanging out with Amanda. Over the years, I’ve done many works of art inspired by her. She’s a muse in my life and I wish I could know her better. I especially love her courage to be herself; it’s inspiring to be different and to honor that difference.
For the evening, I made a digital image taken from Jason Wu’s doll of her. I inserted a gold cross and the papal hat. Oh how I would love to own one of these dolls, but their either impossible to get or super expensive. I am, however, lucky to own the Swatch by David LaChapelle with Amanda’s face on it; it’s genius!
On the back of my leather jacket I ironed this image that read “Amanda For Pope.” After a few photo ops, I gave her the jacket. I hope she wears it proudly. I also handed out stickers, but my campaign for her as pope ended rather quickly. I was empty handed within minutes; I should have made more. Would have been cool if everyone had been wearing one.
During my morning walks for the past couple of weeks, I’ve been plastering stickers in my neighborhood with different images of my LITTLE Pop series. The image featured here is a photo of the same sticker I handed out at Evita. I call it “Handicapped.” Many years ago, Amanda's decision to transition into a woman may have been considered a handicap or even a mental disorder. Nowadays, it can be revered as an act of courage and honesty. Thank you Amanda for being you.
I like the idea that each one of us, in one way or another, is handicapped regardless of who we are or we think we are, this includes the Pope. And so maybe instead of feeling happy for his resignation, I’ll think differently and remember that he to is one of us; he too is human.
George Orwell said it perfectly, “The essence of being human is that one does not seek perfection.” It's easier said than done, but words to live by nonetheless.
Lately I’ve been thinking about time. Does it fly or does it stand still? We’ve often heard the age-old saying, “Time flies when you’re having fun.” But am I really having fun? I believe so; I’ve had 45 great years of life! It’s been an interesting ride; I wouldn’t change a thing.
I can’t remember the last time I felt like time stood still. It may have been almost 15 years ago when I first moved to LA. I had the privilege of meeting a fly on the 2nd floor of Barnes and Noble in Santa Monica. The little fly flew over to where I was sitting and while I read a book, he kept me company. It’s a simple moment in life I will never forget. For months afterwards, I kept going to the same place and sitting in the same spot. Each time I felt calm; I felt inspired.
While on my recent trip to NYC, I came across a book called “The Life of Fly” by Magnus Muhr. I laughed out loud when I opened the page. I kept laughing as I kept flipping through the book. I had to have it; it was too funny and it reminded me of my own Mr. Fly, as I came to call him.
The simplicity of this book got me thinking about art and the amount of time spent on creating any works of art. Is the amount of time spent relevant to the value of art?
The masters spend years on paintings that I can’t imagine doing myself; I’d never finish anything. Plus, I’d be dishonoring the spirit of who I am and how I live my life. Someone once told me not to reveal the amount of time I spent on my art. Honestly, some of my Little Girls took less than an hour to create. And some of my all time favorite pieces are the simplest, the one’s that happened without any effort and hardly a thought. Does this take away from their value? I hope not.
When thinking about time and art, the first person to come to mind is of course Keith Haring. His work was simple, beautiful, and meaningful. He once said, “My contribution to the world is my ability to draw. I will draw as much as I can for as many people as I can for as long as I can.” Ah yes, I feel the same way! In honor of his spirit, the piece here is titled, “Dik.” It’s from my latest LITTLE Dick series. I think Keith would appreciate the sense of silliness and simplicity.
Cheers to you Keith! (If only I could have been a fly on your walls).
I woke up this morning thinking about things… dicks, cocks, penises, pee-pees, wieners, weenies, pingas, vergas, organs, man hoods, horseys, sausages, packages, its, you-know-what’s, you name it… (Actually if you can think of any other names, please let me know.)
It feels like I’m being called to do a new series of artwork. Could it be that my lack of sex, for almost 3 years, has lead me to this moment, possibly! It must be God sent. He created us; he created it. For the past week, I’ve been doodling dick, cock, penises…you name it.
This morning while on my walk, I was thinking about the series and I started realizing that possibly it has to do with having had sex at 7 years old. I was still a little boy, but after sex, I became obsessed with these things, dicks, cocks, penises…you name it. At this time, the details of that first moment are irrelevant, but I know that my life took a different course, none that I regret of course. Especially if it’s led me to this moment and this NEW concept, which I don’t have a name for yet. For the moment, I’d like for the series to come from that innocent place, almost to the moment in time right before I did the ‘dirty deed,’ because it did feel dirty at the time.
The piece here is titled “Eggs and Sausage.” It was the first thing I did after opening my eyes this morning. I did it on my IPAD, but I’m thinking of doing large acrylic portraits. As I move forward with the series, I’m curious about where it will take me; I love this newfound sense of curiosity. It’ll makes life interesting!
After years of having gay sex, I wonder if it’s possible that the series can remain playful, uncomplicated, and possibly innocent? I believe so. I hope so. Ernest Hemingway once said, “All things truly wicked, start from innocence.” If for whatever reasons you happen to find this series, (of dicks, cocks, penises… you name it,) wicked, it ‘s not meant to be shocking, but hopefully a little thought provoking.
Because after all I’ve been through, I’m still that little boy who used to LOVE new erasers on my #2 pencils.
OK, so I’m a few days late, but here is what I meant to post on Monday.
What do Coco Chanel and Sid Vicious have in common?
Nothing that I know of other than they both had a great sense of iconic style. And with a simple Google search, I come to find that back in 2011 designer Kinder Aggugini launched a line of women’s clothes self described as Coco Chanel Marries Sid Vicious. A-ha, so I’m not the only one that sees them together. Makes me wonder what a dinner conversation between them would have been like? If Coco were to say to him, “In order to be irreplaceable one must always be different.” I think Sid would have listened closely. He’s the ultimate icon when it comes to the punk era; he was definitely different! And to this day, defines a look that is irreplaceable.
A few days ago, while working in NYC, I also came to find out that in May, the Metropolitan Museum of Art is going to be exhibiting Punk: Chaos to Couture. I’m so excited! I’ll have to make a special trip especially since I just finished reading Sid’s biography Too Fast too Live. It was short and quite sad. (Odd Note: The story goes that when a woman asked him to fuck her because she wanted something to remember him by, instead of fucking her he shat on her.) I don't hink Coco would have approved.
In wondering what to read on my way back to LA, I remembered having seen Coco Chanel’s biography at Chelsea Market bookstore. When I went back to purchase the book, I instead found “Seven Days in the Art World" by Sarah Thornton.” 50+ pages in and so far it’s been an interesting read about the art world. It makes me wonder about my own career? Is it worth it? Will I receive recognition? As I keep reading, I hope I’m not dissuaded, but rather inspired to keep working on my art regardless of any success.
The portraits here are of Sid and Coco, it kind of sounds better than Sid and Nancy. I had forgotten about Gary Oldman and Courtney Love’s performances; they were both brilliant. Again, thanks to the Internet, I saw for the first time Sid’s original performance of "My Way." I wasn’t too impressed, but nonetheless I’m still a fan.
But through it all, when there was doubt
I ate it up and spit it out
I faced it all and I stood tall and did it my way
There is no other way to live our lives...BE DIFFERENT!
In thinking about what to write this upcoming MLK Day, I thought I’d repost what I wrote last year. I couldn’t say it any better. It started with a dream…
Burr!!! Happy MLK Day. (And Inauguration Day.)
I had a dream last night. Definitely not like the one Mr. King spoke of almost 50 years ago.
I dreamt of myself as a little 6-year old boy unknowingly riding on a bus with an older version of myself. When little me went to tell the bus driver that I needed to pee, he told me to go back to my seat. An innocent bystander came over to help and without a thought, the bus driver opened the door, and while the bus was still moving, he pushed us both out! The remainder of the passengers gasped as little me and the innocent bystander rolled onto the concrete, blood everywhere.
Suddenly, I was now not only observing the dream, but in the dream. I was now the older version of me in the bus. I stood up and yelled to protest his cruel act of violence; I immediately asked for everyone’s assistance. I got very little help and so I got off the bus but I was already too far away from the crime scene. In the end, there was no resolution, the dream got weird and I don’t remember the ending, ugh!
This morning I woke up and decided to read MLK’s “I Have A Dream” speech; I read it word for word, as I had only done so once before when reading his autobiography. After all these years, the words are still powerful. They reminded me of all the inequality that still exists in our country, our world. The one phrase that caught my attention was “we cannot walk alone.” It sort of summed up everything. How often do we get consumed into our little lives, not realizing that we do not and cannot walk this earth alone? We, each and every one of us, are all connected, past, present, and future!
(Rather than post last years image, (Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness), the piece featured here is titled, “MLK”). In his speech, MLK quotes this ‘unalienable right.’ There’s that little me that just doesn’t understand how such a simple thing cannot be granted to us all. How does it all get so complicated? And in one simple answer, I think religion really fucks us up and keeps us from uniting as one world.
(Obama- to hear a King proclaim that our individual freedom is inextricably bound to the freedom of every soul on Earth.)
John Lennon said it best:
“Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people living life in peace
You, you may say
I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one
I hope some day you'll join us
And the world will be as one"
So I woke up this morning and thought is it really Friday again? Where did the week go? After almost 45 years of life, I've been lucky enough to live 2,312 Fridays in my lifetime!
A few weeks ago while waiting in line to purchase a copy of 1000 Portrait Illustrations by Julia Schonlau, I found a perfect book waiting for me. It called You Are A Circle by Guillaume Wolf. It’s a visual meditation for the creative mind. I believe God wanted me to have it. Yesterday as I flipped open to a random page for my daily dose, it said, “If you think you know everything, you’re dead as an artist.” I laughed out loud as I had just been writing about thinking too much. I think this applies to not only being an artist but to being alive, period. We can never know everything. There’s no need to, otherwise life would not be worth living. How dull would life be to NOT ever learn something new?
Aside from the beautiful blurbs inside the book, I love the title! I like the idea of me being a circle. I’d rather be a circle than 'be square.' With my latest digital series, I’ve become a bit obsessed with dots. It’s like the book was written for me. The portrait here is titled “Einstein.” I love the silliness of the original photo. I like to stick out my own tongue as well; it reminds me of being a little brat. Einstein once said, “The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.” It sort of applies to what I’m trying to say. Though I think of myself as being intelligent I don’t mind feeling or acting a little stupid. I kind of like it. If, for example, I don’t know something, like the meaning of a word, I’ll ask a question. There’s no need for me to pretend to know something when I don’t know. It's one of those things I like about me.
I’m looking forward to tomorrow. I get to spend it with two loves in my life, Alex and Vero. We’re going on a hike in Griffith Park. It’ll be my 2,312th Saturday. And with them, I can be and act as stupid as I want; they love me anyway. I love them back; it’s a big circle of unconditional love. Maybe love does make the world go round and round.
…and round
Oh boy, it’s another chilly day in LaLa Land. In the 15 years I’ve lived here, I don’t recall it ever being this cold. But I can’t complain; life is good.
I meant to post yesterday, but somehow the writing didn’t come along. I couldn’t get a clear idea written down. I’m giving it another shot today; we’ll see how it goes.
One definition for surrender is ‘To give up or give back.’ A second is, ‘To give over or resign (oneself) to something, as to an emotion.’
I’m not thinking about waving a white flag and giving up on anything, especially not life. But since my previous post, I’ve been thinking about this word and what it means for myself. What exactly am I surrendering? Is detachment a better word? Possibly. If so, then what am I attached to? The first thing that came to mind is thinking and thought. I think too much. Though it comes in handy for writing purposes, I’m starting to wonder if possibly, it’s keeping me from being fully present in life.
French philosopher Rene Descartes once said, “I think, therefore I am.” But what if instead it’s “I don’t think and therefore I live.” Though he was referring to man’s existence, what if thought prevents us from existing in our present world. Are we lingering too much on the past or future?
Since thinking about not taking life to seriously, I’ve felt lighter in spirit. However, I'm finding that letting go doesn't happen so easily. It’s easier said than done. My ego, or Igor as I like to call it, keeps me from surrendering; it’s need for control is it’s very existence. Maybe Descartes is onto something. If Igor doesn’t think, he doesn’t exist. The trick now is how to I keep this little monster of an ego quiet? Meditation? Hmm… I think I’m onto something. In meditation it's about not grasping onto a thought; it's about observing them flow by, nothing else. A river flows perfectly.
The portrait here is of Frankenstein. Though he’s considered to be the original monster of monsters, like everyone else, he simply wanted acceptance. And as for ego/ Igor maybe it too wants acceptance. And so instead of completely detaching myself from it, I’ll allow for it to coexist with who I am. Because who I am is not who I think I am.
Until next time, observe lightly.
Happy Friday and here's to the 3 R's: Reading, Riding and Rules. 
