Tuesday, September 25, 2012
Joy To Our World
It’s not’s XMAS, but we’re exactly 3 months away.
I’m just coming home from my super-duper-early morning walk. There were tears in my eyes. Of joy or sadness, I couldn’t tell at first.
But before I begin, a very special Happy Birthday to one of the most amazing people I know, me!
I’ve spent the last 44 years of life, getting to know myself. ‘Knowing’ doesn’t happen easily; it’s a process of solitude, reflection, and observation. Luckily, I’ve been willing to sit through the dark parts; it’s in these darkest hours that my heart opens and makes life worthy.
Viktor E. Frankl wrote, “But there was no need to be ashamed of tears, for tears bore witness that a man had the greatest of courage, the courage to suffer.” He couldn’t have said it any better. I’ve come to understand the meaning of these words, especially in the last couple of months. If I am worthy of life, I am worth of suffering, of love, of joy and everything else. Other than recently, I can’t remember crying more than when first reading his book, Man’s Search For Meaning. It remains to be my favorite book of all time; it changed my life.
And as for life, thank you Mama for bringing me into this world. On the day I was born, Mama said I had the biggest brown eyes she had ever seen. I can’t imagine there NOT being joy in her eyes when saw me then and now. I’ve often wondered if there was joy in the eyes of nurses and doctors who helped bring me into the world. More than any gift or birthday wish, I want to have joy in my eyes when I go out into the world, everyday, every minute, every second. I think its possible. And I can’t imagine living life any differently than believing it possible.
The piece here is titled, ‘Birthday Suits.’ It’s inspired my 1-year old birthday portrait at the Sears in East LA. It’s this little boy I imagine when life gets tough. Along with wonder and curiosity, there was joy in my eyes, there still is. My great friend, Robert, likes to quote Bugs Bunny and say, "Tell me more about my eyes." They are words I've never forgotten; they make me smile and remind me to see beauty all around us.
As for the tears so early this morning, they were tears of joy. I felt alive and blessed. I felt worthy. If I were to count my blessings, I’d be here forever.
Cheers to you all. To braving our world with courage, love, kindness, and joy.